Here we are — no more babies in this house. It’s hard not to get a little “baby fever” even though overall I’m excited for everything coming up and glad so many hard parts are over. I’m ecstatic for my body to be my own again when I wean in another couple of months and recoil at the idea of going through pregnancy, birth, recovery, and the brutal exhaustion of the newborn months making me barely fit to be a parent to my other kids. I’m on birth control pills, and I’ve felt kind of under the weather and irritable since I started them. Sigh. Now my body is hijacked by synthetic hormones. Hopefully it’ll even out soon.
Mainly I’m absolutely thrilled with the two kids I have, and it’s hard enough dividing myself between them. I seriously don’t understand how people have 4 or 5 or 6 kids. It does not compute. But it’s also a nice thought to give Ali a brother or Ayla a sister. But, that logic could keep going for a while, and I am 41, and I hate getting my cycle every month, too. And hey, birth control fails sometimes, LOL.
Just some ramblings. Life is awesome. It’s just a little wistful when the last babe walks off and starts blowing her own nose. They are so amazing, and increasing them by 150% would be that much more amazing, right? But a friend of mine had spontaneous twins after IVF and they were pretty blindsided by it. Anything could happen, especially at this age. Our plan remains to leave awesome enough alone. But it’s OK to feel a little melancholy about that.
On February 8 Ayla had her well visit (12 months 4 days) and she was 30.25 inches (84th percentile), 20.8 pounds (64th percentile), with a head circumference of 46.5 cm (87th percentile). She’s up to date on vaccinations and had no apparent side effects, though she’s been snotty for a few weeks now. Ali has, too. Probably brought home from preschool. It’s almost comforting for them to have a normal ol’ cold. But I’ll be glad when they quit snotting all over the place!
I turned 41 on January 21, a day after we FINALLY got a new president. So glad that horrible jackass is cowering in Florida, where his neighbors don’t want him, either. Best birthday present ever. Especially when my 2016 birthday brought both Trump and the death of my best friend’s dad, who was someone I really loved as well. And I still didn’t have any kids at that time. Such a low point.
Here’s to good things ahead!
Jan5: Ali napped at school today! He’s been resisting naps lately and being a fragile grump most of the evening when he skips it. He skipped it at school yesterday — he was the only one who did. I was afraid it would be a trend, but hopefully, maybe, just a one-off.
I’m also so grateful they expose him to a wide variety of food — wider than I could reasonably do every day, especially when he rejects so much. He eats pretty well there, and it takes a great deal of pressure off me.
Jan5: Grandma’s here! Ali is so happy
Jan6: We are meant to deliver Ali to his grandma’s apartment today at 9am. Ali woke up at 7:30am saying, “It’s Grandma time!”
Ahmed said, “Grandma is asleep right now.”
He accepted it for a while, then said, “No, she’s having coffee!”
Well, he was right. So Ahmed said, “She wants some time alone right now.”
Ali said, “She not gonna bite me.”
Ahmed laughed. “No, she’s not a cat.”
Back story: Ali has spent much of his life tormenting our cat, only to have our cat hiss at him and/or run away. We’ve explained to him that “Mateo wants some time alone right now. That’s what it means when he hisses like that. He may bite you if you don’t leave him alone.”
So. Yeah. Apparently anyone who wants some time alone is going to bite him if they don’t get it
Jan6: Ali’s grey cat robe came! It’s perfect. Good choice, kid.
Jan6: OK, now Ali is hissing and biting people while wearing his cat robe…
Jan8: Ali cried because the cereal bar we played catch with was broken when it came out of the package.
Ahmed cheered him up.
Then he cried because “I don’t want to be happy!”
Boy needs his daily nap. Didn’t get one today.
And I’m kinda worried he’s leading an insurrection. Four other kids from his class (who normally have naps) didn’t have a nap today, either.
Jan9: These are my best two color options for Ayla’s birthday t-shirt (that she can wear, if she wants, every birthday until she turns 18). I can’t decide which one. She looks great in dusty rose colors, but I worry the pink is too jarring. But the navy blue is a bit boring. I wish they had more colors!
Jan10: We have a timer that I used one time to show Ali how long it would be until Grandma would come. I said, “When the timer goes off, Grandma will be here.”
Now when he misses Grandma, he asks me to set the timer again. Apparently it’s a magic device that makes Grandma appear.
Jan10: This little goober got my scarf and hat on all by herself
Jan11: Let’s just take a mulligan, please? I was doing good with plans, getting things done, staying healthier, then Wednesday happened and it’s been five straight days of doomscrolling.
And let’s just assume this week will be a mulligan, too. The new year will start for me on my birthday, January 21.
Jan12: Dang, buddy, slow down.
(The teacher said she put a word up for them as a model, just for fun. Ali was the only one who actually copied it.)
Jan13: With Ali, we obsessed over every milestone, and it was so easy to go on walks with him or take him to the park.
Ayla is so low-key and content playing by herself, it’s easy to still let Ali have the lion’s share of time and attention. Any time we take both kids to the park, we have to both be there or it’s nearly impossible to keep a good eye on both. Any time we go for a walk, we have to take a giant double stroller and Ali complains much of the time about this or that, wanting to go somewhere else or do something else, wanting Baba to carry him, wanting Ayla’s seat instead of his… It’s kind of exhausting. (He doesn’t really “get” a walk for fun unless it’s going somewhere. He certainly has no patience for watching Ayla toddle around while we try to keep rocks and trash out of her mouth.)
Now with Ali in school (or in today’s case spending time with his grandparents), I can finally really spend focused time with Ayla during daylight hours. It’s a joy. Yesterday we went to the park and did the swings for a while, then I let her down to explore. She just wanted to sit and watch other kids play. Finally I stood her up and held her hand, and she walked me right back to the swings.
Today we went to the river, and again when I released her from the stroller she just wanted to sit and look around. We went further on a bit, and then she wanted to stand and look around.
Finally she started walking, but she wasn’t used to uneven terrain and fell pretty easily. She started to get a bit frustrated, then downright alarmed and in pain when a fall would come with a side of sand burrs. (Good Lord in Heaven how I loathe sand burrs.) But she kept gamely getting up and trying again, and after ten minutes she was visibly better at it.
We went back to the park, and I set her down halfway between the swings and the slide. She walked right to the steps up the slide and hung out in front of the stairs for maybe five minutes, just looking and getting used to it and digging around in the mulch with her feet. Then she climbed swiftly to the top and checked out the platform (walled except for the stairs, the slide, and an open place that led to a fire pole or something). When she walked to the slide, I sat down and we slid down together.
There were no other kids there, so when she started trying to climb back up the slide, I let her make many attempts in various ways for quite some time. Finally she settled on walking up a bit, flopping onto her belly, and slithering down backwards. She did that a few times and then walked back toward the stroller.
Nap time now. She earned it.
Jan13: Ayla is now at the stage where trash cans are irresistible and clothes being left on a shelf for more than two seconds is intolerable.
Oh well. Nice with the second to really understand it’s all just a stage and it all will pass!
Jan13: I finally got Ali reading books again.
Every night, we read:
Everyone Poops
and
Where’s the Poop?
Good times!
The nightly dialogue with the girl pooping behind a door is a highlight. Good thing I’m trained in Improv…
Jan14: Ayla turned 9 months on November 4, but I scheduled her well visit for November 2 because I was genuinely nervous about widespread violence / civilizational collapse on November 3.
People on Facebook now are talking about stocking up on supplies and not leaving the house until after January 20, and/or worrying about friends (who are not straight, white, Christian males) getting hurt or killed by gangs of armed, angry MAGA and QAnon people.
We are a nation living under siege by domestic terrorists. I’m f***ing sick of it.
Jan14: I swear to God, there’s a black hole somewhere in this apartment. Now I can’t find Ali’s birthday shirt. His bday’s not coming up until April 9, but if I’ve already looked everywhere, I don’t know what’s gonna change between now and then. Grrr.
Jan15: Lovevery accidentally sent us a play kit for 7-8-month-old babies instead of the block set I ordered.
Figured I might as well let Ayla play with one of the toys for 5 minutes. She put the ball in the hole over and over, and once when it got caught in the box, she bent down to look for it. After a while she tipped the whole platform up the other way to make the ball roll back into the box.
She played with it every which way until I got a camera, then she lost interest and wandered away. So hard to get good pics these days! These kids are just living their lives. Not into documenting it.
Jan15: Me: Hey, you know what? There’s no school Monday. It’s a holiday.
Ali: I want to find candy.
Me: You want candy?
Ali: I want you to hide it so I can find it.
Me: Oh, like on Halloween? (We did an “Easter egg hunt” for candy on Halloween.) You think that’s what we do on holidays?
Ali: Yeah. That would be funny.
Me: It would be funny to do it on Martin Luther King Day. OK. We’ll do that on Monday.
Ali: Not on Monday. We could do it… today.
Why not just have an Easter egg hunt for candy every day, for that matter?
Jan18: Every day that comes and goes without too much dumbf**kery, I breathe a sigh of relief. Every morning I check Google News and hope for no screaming headlines. Every evening around sunset, I exhale.
Please let it be over soon…
Jan19: Ali would be SO MAD if he knew Grandma was playing with Ayla without him…
Jan19: Ali’s school goes all the way to high school, and their middle school is currently in the thick of Academic Bowl tournaments.
Put me in, coach!
I want to jump in so bad… My trigger thumb is itching.
(What the hell do middle schoolers know anyway? What the hell did I know?)
Jan20: I remember when I was a kid, there was nothing more delicious than sucking on a wet rag in the bath tub. I love watching Ayla do it (at least before the water gets too dirty / soapy).
Meanwhile both kids have some kind of crud (I assume not COVID since we all had it two months ago), and man, what a difference it makes when a kid can blow their nose. (Ali can. Ayla can’t. Poor girl.)
Ayla also got a pink cat robe (not LL Bean this time, just a $17 knock-off since she’s not yet old enough to choose her own robe), and it’s pretty dang cute having two fuzzy cats wandering around here. Three counting our actual cat.
Jan20: We told Ali we were watching This Is Us. He kept looking and looking, trying to figure out which one was Mama, which one was Baba, and which one was Ali.
Because, after all, it was “us.” Right?
Ali didn’t eat dinner tonight (didn’t get a chance anyway — Ayla found it first and spread it far and wide, including in a basket full of clean laundry), and we finally settled on something he would eat: A chocolate-covered yogurt bar. But then we started another episode of This Is Us.
I said, “You want to take a break and give him a yogurt bar?”
Ahmed kind of shrugged and we kept watching for a little while.
Then Ali said, “You want to break Mama and get a…”
I laughed and he immediately switched mid-sentence to, “What do?” (Meaning “What are you doing?” meaning “What are you laughing about?”)
We’re laughing at you, little grey cat. Because you are so dang cute.
Jan21: Thank you, everyone. I haven’t had a minute to sit down and read all your kind greetings, but I look forward to it!
It was a lovely birthday. A little hectic at first because Ayla is a bit sick and sleeping like crap and I’m slightly under the weather and not doing well with her bad sleep making my sleep worse.
I sleepwalked through the first couple hours (at least Ali was happy to go to school) and then napped through the next hour (while Ayla napped), then delivered Ayla to her grandma so I could do some shopping.
Came back just in time to do an exercise video before picking Ali up from school, delivered him to his grandma (Ayla was back at home napping by then), got some things done and played with Ayla for an hour, delivered her to her grandma again only to find a little surprise party waiting for me. We had Mardi Gras king cake, and Mom got me a copy of Carl Sagan’s Cosmos (my original copy was stolen in the Great Storage Facility Heist of 2016).
Then Ahmed and I went for a walk by the river. Like old times. Before a little munchkin spends the entire time whining about wishing he was mowing the lawn, lol. Pretty sunset.
Then we came back home, ordered sushi, and watched the latest episode of This Is Us (or most of it) until it was time to pick both kids up from grandma. Then we had more cake because I hadn’t known a party was waiting for me, and I picked up a berry Chantilly cake for myself at Whole Foods. Ayla had most of the berries. Ahmed got me some sweet, thoughtful gifts.
I am as full of fish, rice, and buttercream as I have any right to be. Life is so good
Jan21: Ayla and I had our longest conversation ever today. She would make some goofy noise, I would mimic it, she’d laugh hysterically, then I’d laugh. Then she’d make another goofy noise, I’d copy it, and she’d laugh hysterically.
I think she’s part dolphin.
Jan21: That time Uncle Bernie showed up for our Christmas picture…
Jan21: One of Ali’s poop books asks the leading question, “What does whale poop look like?” without answering it.
So Ali and I had to look it up on Youtube.
It is… not good. Big brown swirling liquidy cloud. In the ocean, it’s bad enough. In a tank, it’s an absolute disaster.
Jan22: My first baby, shortly before my first human baby was born.
Jan22: I’m giving myself the gift of a computer-free weekend. Grateful, at least, to have professionals at the helm for a while. Utterly incompetent soulless bigoted grifters — the worst of the worst — are exhausting in their own special way. Just having at least some people who know (and care) anything about anything at all… It’s something.
Back to it all on Monday.
Jan22: [Post by my mom] This will probably be the funniest thing I see all day. If Ali is up when I meditate he always comes and snuggles in and “sits” with me. I don’t even open my eyes. Even though I knew Bill snapped this pic, I had NO IDEA that Ali was on a direct line with the Almighty! Or that he had brought what he calls “special” tape to put on my knee. I only just really looked at this today…
Jan22: My brother posted a picture of me, my cousin Lindsay, himself, and my little sister Val.
Jan23: Just popping in to document that Ayla climbed the little stairs and slid down a baby slide all on her own for the first time Friday, January 22. Love that determined little monkey. And how her baby fine hair blows back and her face lights up when she scooches her little butt up to the edge and then lets herself fly.
Jan25: Yesterday I was randomly singing “My Favorite Things” from The Sound of Music, and Ali asked, “What’s that?”
I said, “It’s a song you sing when kids are scared of thunder. Even though thunder isn’t dangerous. It’s scary to some kids.”
(One thing I will never say to my kids is: “That’s not scary.” It’s not up to me what any other person finds scary. Some adults are scared of mice, after all. I sometimes say, “It might be scary, but it’s not dangerous.”)
Anyway. Just after Ali went to bed, there was an unexpected thunderstorm. As I was kissing him good-night, he said, “Sing the thunder song.”
So I got to introduce him to the song and then sing it in context in the same day š
He didn’t seem to like the “dog bites, bee stings” part, so I rewrote it later to:
“When the thunder makes me wonder why Iām feeling sad,
I simply remember my favorite things and then I will feel so glad!”
I’ll also have to write some new verses about leaf blowers and lawn mowers…
Jan25: Where it comes to finding our purpose and meaning, I think of life as a dark and slippery mountain. Sometimes we don’t even know if we’re going up or down. Sometimes the only indication is the most subtle shift in air density that you might well be imagining. Sometimes we climb quite a bit only to slide down even further. We don’t even know what’s at the top, if anything.
Friends are important in this scenario…
Jan25: In Ali’s class they do a lot of cool work with wires and beads. When Ali is in a bad mood, he says, “I don’t like _____” (including stuff he definitely likes), and I try to empathize with him.
The other day he didn’t want to go to school and he said, “I don’t like wire work!”
I made a sympathetic sound and said, “Back to the sweat shop, eh?”
He sighed. “Yeah. Back to the sweat shop.”
Jan26: When Ali was right in between where Ayla is now and where Ali is now, on e year ago… It’s wonderful that Ali can say almost anything now (humidifier, triceratops, whatever he wants), and I can’t wait until Ayla can say anything! She’s pretty mum for now other than “Mama” and “Baba.” Like her brother before her.
Ali translation key:
Berber = blueberry
Bearbear = gummy bear vitamin
Saursaur = dinosaur
Sickle = bicycle / motorcycle
Shaaaaklit = chocolate (said like the sisters in Frozen)
Guck = drink
Gock = dog
Wawa = water
Bakoom = vacuum
Waddit = rabbit
Sin = medicine
Sugar = finger (don’t know why…)
Whee-ooh = whale
Siyen = siren (I’m so glad we have this word — now that he can identify it, he’s not as scared of them, whatever form they take, including the tornado siren tests on Wednesdays)
These are just off the top of my head, not remotely exhaustive. He has maybe a couple hundred words and says most of them pretty well
Jan26: This week Ali has started saying, “I like school now! It’s so much fun!”
He also says he likes his wobble board now.
Will food be next?
(Every evening, if dinner is even mentioned, he wails, “I don’t like dinner!”)
Jan26: A work in progress (extra verses to Favorite Things, customized to Ali):
Tall yellow vacuums with little round handles
Scooters, computers, and cupcakes with candles
Playing with Baba, a Mama who sings
These are a few of my favorite things
Grandma and Grandpa and quiet leaf blowers
Dust busters, dust pans, and riding lawn mowers
Playing at parks on the slides and the swings
These are a few of my favorite things
When the thunder makes me wonder why Iām feeling sad,
I simply remember my favorite things and then I will feel so glad!
Jan26: Ayla is finally perfecting her “get off high things feet first” maneuver. Quite a milestone. She can now exit the couch or the bed without injury or drama.
Jan26: Well, now I know why Ali suddenly likes school.
I said to his teacher today, “Does he ever go on the swings?” I see other kids on them all the time but haven’t see Ali on them at pick-up.
She said, “Sure, sometimes. But he mostly likes the sand box and the trucks and the bikes. Oh, and he recently found a little black tube that we have lying around and he’s been using it as a vacuum, like to suck up the sand and stuff.”
Aaaaaaah. He’s found his vacuum.
Meanwhile, Ayla is a prodigy at blowing her nose. She’s not yet a year old and can blow when you put a cloth to her nose. Not super effectively, but the attempt is clear. Right now she’s carrying a cloth around trying to blow her nose on her own! Again, not very effectively, but it’s clear what she’s trying to do.
Jan26: A toddler’s entire job description:
F*** around.
Find out.
Jan26: Ayla’s first birthday is next week. I got two really cool things: A play kitchen and a sweet wooden block set. Both have always been meant for both kids to enjoy, not specifically for Ayla. In fact, my original plan was to give them both to Ali for his birthday, but I don’t want to wait two months for them to play with these things. They are great indoor toys for crummy weather.
Also of note: I didn’t get Ali anything for his first birthday. Just a cake. He got gifts on his second birthday and will get a ton of gifts on his third birthday (in April).
Should I:
(a) Give both things (kitchen and blocks) to Ayla for her birthday and let Ali learn how to tolerate other people getting gifts and parties (not easy for any two-year-old)
(b) Give both things on Ayla’s birthday but say they are for everyone (so Ali feels included in Ayla’s birthday?)
(c) Give both things at a random time and say they are for everyone (i.e., leave Ayla’s birthday out of it, and Ayla just gets a cake on her birthday like her brother did when he turned one)
[I gave both things at random times — the kitchen the day before Ayla’s birthday, the blocks the day of, but I just pulled it out to play with, no one unwrapped it.]
Jan27: We like to give Ali choices, like, “It’s OK if you don’t want to eat lunch, but if not it’ll be time for you to take a nap. Lunch or a nap, those are your options.”
Today he was climbing around on the couch and saying half to himself, “I want to watch leaf blowers, vacuums, and push mowers. Those are my options.”
I think he likes his own options better.
Ayla learned a while ago how to climb up into the toddler tower by herself. I said to her today, “Baby girl, that’s a toddler tower, not an infant tower.” I guess she is almost officially a toddler, though (next week!)
Anything we put in front of her that she can possibly climb on top of, she does. And often kind of wags her butt up and down after she does. She’s a little twerking mountain goat.
(And now she’s walking around blowing her nose on a used (wet) diaper.)
Jan27: First a southern drawl much thicker than mine, now this…
Jan28: Ali in the car today: “Does the sun makes the outside lighter?”
Jan29: Ayla seemed to sign “all done” today. Previously she’s been waving her arms wildly, which could have just been baby exuberance. But today she just rotated her little hands in space.
It’s such a miracle to witness this light bulb go off.
Feb3: Well, it’s happened. Ali doesn’t just want a trim. He wants us to “mow” his hair.
Recommendations for a curly-headed boy who wants it short?
Feb3: One year ago today — the day before Ayla was born. Ali was so little! Such a little tiny guy to take on the venerable station of big brother…
Feb3: Busted out the new kid kitchen. A huge hit!
Feb3: Ayla has a “word” she likes to say over and over. I hear Nummy:
“Num-mee-num-mee-num-mee.”
Ahmed hears Meena:
“Mee-na-mee-na-mee-na.”
It’s “laurel or yanny” all over again.
Feb3: When Ali’s trying to learn a new skill, we sometimes say, “Go ahead, keep trying. Try harder.”
Well, the tables have turned on us. He’s figured out how to disarm the child-proof door knobs by just ripping them off with brute strength.
He said proudly, “I got it off. I tried and then tried harder.”
Feb4: Yep. That happened a year ago. Happy first birthday, Ayla Rain! Technically it’ll happen at 6pm today.
Feb4: Ayla got her very first piece of birthday mail from her beloved great-grandma, Virginia Reavis! Thank you, Grandma ā¤
Then there’s a photo of her holding aloft a vacuum attachment like the Torch of Liberty… And she randomly started sweeping the floors today.
Feb4: Technically she’s not a year old until 6pm. But you strike while the iron’s hot with these blanket photos.
And these are the last. The blanket only goes up to a year.
No more infants in this household in T minus 3.5 hours…
Feb4: Family pic with Grandma on Ayla’s first birthday
Feb4: Mama got Ayla the cutest little hippy dress for her birthday, but I couldn’t get a single shot of her standing up wearing it because she never stopped moving unless someone held her, haha. She also got a super cool puzzle with family pictures under the pieces. Her gift from me was a wooden block set in lovely multi-colors.
Meanwhile Ali got a vest and hedge trimmer for Ayla’s birthday. Can’t beat a deal like that!
Feb4: Found some more Ayla hippy dress cuteness!
(She walked all over the apartment carrying Mom’s cell phone, staring at it like a little business executive. At one point she went into the living room and just walked in a tight circle, like a little dance, with her free hand held elegantly out for balance, and then kept on walking. She is so funny.)
Feb4: We did a balloon drop in the kitchen, and Ayla looked like she had seen the face of God. She was wearing her special Class of 2038 t-shirt that her Aunt Val made for her. Then we put her in the same pale blue cloth diaper Ali had worn on his first birthday, added a cute head band, and gave her a smash cake.
We did it before dinner so she would be hungry and not too tired. Or so we hoped.
Alas, much like Ali before her, she got confused and cried (after immediately removing the head band). She ate a few berries off the top and cried some more. It took her a very long time to even smush her name around a little, and she managed to get all her toes covered in buttercream, but she had zero interest in eating the cake. So Baba and I ate it. We took some videos, but they are very boring and a little sad. Definitely a “Pinterest fail” (if I was on Pinterest). Oh well. The balloon drop pic is kinda cute!
She’s a bit under the weather and her nose is running like a faucet. First birthdays, man, it can be a rough time! I think she had fun overall, especially once we went to visit Grandma and Grandpa.
Feb4: We gave Mateo a cat treat after we clipped his claws. Ali asked what it was. We said it was like candy for cats.
So, naturally he wanted to try one. I gave him one, expecting Mr. Picky not to even put it anywhere near his mouth. But he stuck it right in. After a while he said, “It’s not too bad.” Then: “I’m gonna be a cat.”
I sighed, trying to figure out how to stop him from asking for the rest of the pack. “Well, next time we clip your claws, you can have another one, I guess.”
Mom commented: He will start saying fftttttt!
Feb5: There’s a Youtube channel where a soft-spoken British guy unboxes every vacuum cleaner known to man — real and toy — and tests them. His average video is about 15 minutes long and has a few hundred views.
These are Ali’s people.
Feb6: When we realize our parents are imperfect, we become adolescents.
When we forgive them, we become adults.
When we forgive ourselves, we become wise.
(Author unknown)
Feb7: Ali pointed out that I left candy out of his “Favorite Things” song, so I fixed that. (Replaced “dust pans” — lost a little bit of parallelism, but oh well)
Here’s the working version:
Tall yellow vacuums with little round handles
Scooters, computers, and cupcakes with candles
Playing with Baba, a Mama who sings
These are a few of my favorite things
Grandma and Grandpa and quiet leaf blowers
Dust busters, candy, and riding lawn mowers
Playing at parks on the slides and the swings
These are a few of my favorite things
When the thunder makes me wonder why Iām feeling sad
I simply remember my favorite things and then I will feel so glad!
Last night, in the middle of a book, Ali said, “I want to hear the thunder song.”
After I sang it, he said: “That’s my favorite song.”
Feb7: Everyone’s kinda sick. Weather’s crap. Good day to sit around and watch American football. And in Ayla’s case, bop to the national anthem.
Feb8: Last night I dreamed I accidentally drove into a flood under a bridge and hydroplaned. But I was able to get control again and didn’t wreck.
Today, getting Ali from school, I lost control on icy bridges twice.
I was going very slowly, with large distances between cars. The brakes were useless a couple times. I just kept tapping ’til the tires made contact with the road again. But man. My nerves are shot.
Have to go to damn Walmart now. We have nothing and the weather is only getting worse.
Feb8: Ayla’s one year well visit was today, on top of everything. Still a big healthy girl. 84th percentile for height, 64th percentile for weight. She didn’t like the shots, but overall took it like a champ.
Made it back home after hitting ice on a bridge twice on my way to get Ali, then went back to Walmart to stock up. Ali offered to put the groceries away while I went to get the rest out of the car.
Came back to this.
