I realize I haven’t written any content warnings on my posts so far, and a big part of that is because I consider myself still very much in the trenches. I may be peeking my head out a tiny bit right now for the first time in years, but I’m all too well aware that one misstep, one stroke of bad luck, and I’m right back where I started.
Honestly, I feel like Wile E. Coyote walking over a cliff. As long as I don’t look down, maybe everything will be OK. But I do know I’m walking on very thin ice indeed.
Another part of the reason is because I have followed several “fertility issues” blogs, and it always annoys me when they suddenly clam up as soon as they have good news. I appreciate that it’s out of sensitivity for others who aren’t so lucky at the moment, but I also know I can click away if I don’t feel like reading something, and in general I want good news for EVERYONE. And if I’ve followed you this far through hell, I want to get the good stuff, too!
Just my opinion, and I fully understand and respect that it’s not shared by everyone. But for me, the good stuff is not only inspiring (hey, if she can do it after all that, maybe I can, too!), it’s often also instructive. Birth stories fascinate me. And raising donor conceived children is, of course, its own special, fascinating adventure.
So if I’m very lucky, this blog will turn from a “fertility issues” blog into a “pregnancy” blog and then a “raising donor embryo kids” blog.
*Furiously knocks every piece of wood I can find*
If I’m unlucky, I’ll be knocked right back into the trenches before you know it, a broken down heap of heartache once again, until I pull my ass back up again for another try — once more unto the breach.
But I’ll be honest, and I’ll be open. And if any part of it is tough for you to read right now, I will completely understand if you’d rather steer clear for a while.
Love and hugs to everyone, wherever you are on this “journey from hell.” Whether you’re so far down in the trenches you don’t know if you’ll ever see light again, or if you’re already on to the good part and loving every moment of it.
Or, like me, kind of in between, with so much hope and so much to lose.
Wishing for good things for us all.