Another Hurdle Cleared

Just got back from an exhausting forty-hour trip to Davis, CA, for the saline ultrasound that would determine (a) if I could go ahead with this cycle and (b) if I would qualify for getting my money back (or trying three more times) if three donor embryo cycles with this clinic — and its 90% success rate — manage to fail.

I had to get up at 4:50am and had barely eaten anything by the time I’d taken two planes and two buses to get to the Mexican restaurant near the clinic at 1pm California time (3pm Oklahoma time). I wolfed down crappy taquitos and heartbreakingly watery guacamole (I expect better from California) and felt almost human again.

The clinic was smaller than I expected, but everyone was super sweet. The nurse said all the staff were like sisters. Dr. Goud was friendly as well and seemed surprised at how nice my ovaries looked. (I explained our bad luck with IVF, and he shrugged and continued.) He injected the saline into my womb and said it looked very nice as well. I think he’s used to getting a lot of last-chance cases (we were lucky enough to start pretty young and also lose our stomach for IVF after “only” three tries), and he didn’t even have to think it over before telling me he’d recommend me for the guarantee.

So that was a huge weight off my back. All that was left was to figure out public transport to my hostel in Sacramento (a bus and a train), book my next flight for my lining check ultrasound on December 28 (I was so tired I first booked a flight for the wrong time, then booked another one to the wrong city; luckily I caught both mistakes in time to cancel them and get a full refund), eat some pho, chat with a Guatemalan guy, and pass out next to a woman against whose snores my earplugs were useless.

The next morning, after giving myself my Lupron injection, I had to walk for 15 minutes in the rain, and the bus was ten minutes late, but otherwise all went smoothly. That 42B bus just kinda goes almost everywhere I needed to go.

At the airport, TSA took my Lupron out of its cooler to examine the ice packs around it, and a Chinese woman came up to me afterwards and said excitedly, “I saw your Lupron, are you doing IVF, too?”

I said not exactly, I was trying embryo adoption, and she tried to sell me on trying IVF again, this time at CNY.

Everyone has an opinion… 😀

Anyway, other than feeling exhausted and like my head is filled with sand, I finally started getting excited — like this is really happening. And it’s the best chance I’ve ever had. It’s hard to even imagine success right now after all these years of failure. Hope is hard after it’s been dashed for 40 months straight. By now actually growing a baby or two inside my belly seems like science fiction. But… well, I suppose we’ll see.

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